27 October 2006

2:30 A.M (Am I 12?)

Middle of the night. I love the middle of the night. And I love Trader Joe's. Give thanks for cheap wine that softens the echo of this empty white apartment. Chiraz. Rumpled twin beds and balloons bumped up to the ceiling to remind me my girls were here. And they are not. Just me here for days and days and no place to hide in 660 sqaure feet of white and color scattered in the toys on my floor sitting silently waiting for my babies to come home and play. Michael Franti singing to me. I love Michael Franti. Am in love with Michael Franti. Michael Franti and cheap red win.

Because:

I been down for far too long
Till my faith was nearly gone
I never knew somebody just like you
would be a friend I could call my own
Till I let go of a broken heart
I Let go to an open heart and
I Let go of my broken dreams
I Let go to the mystery and
I believe in the miracle
I believe in the spiritual
I believe in the one above
I believe in the one of love

And take one step close to you
I just take one step closer to you
Even when I'm falling down
my heart says follow through
I just take one step closer to you

I never meant to hurt you, no
And you never meant to hurt me too
but it seems like we always do
And even though I'm scared somtimes
If I ever see you falling down
I'll be the one that's there for you
I let go of a broken heart
I Let go to an open heart and
I Let go of my broken dreams
I Let go to the mystery and
I believe in the miracle
I believe in the spiritual
I believe in the one above
I believe in the one of love

And take one step closer to you
I just take one step closer to you
Even when I'm falling down my heart says follow through

See me walking on the streets sometimes
I'm walking

I just take one step one step closer to you
Even when I'm falling down my heart says follow through
I take one step closer
I just take two steps closer

Keep on walking sweet baby

And this is why I love Michael:

To the East to the West
To the North and South
One love people never gonna stop

One to creation
One to the sun
One to the morning
One to the one
One to the air and the freshness we breath
One the force of the change in the seasons
One to the mother from which all things come
One to the daughters and
One to the sons
One to the fathers who help us believe
that nothings ever gonna harm you see and
One to the soldier that walks city streets
One to the soldier that fights over seas and
One for the man who gets down on his knees
and prays for guidance and protection please
and
To the East to the West
To the North and South
One love people never gonna stop
One to the woman
One to the man
One to the culture from the time that it began
One to destruction
One to birth
One to the people who still fight for the earth
One to the people who suffer for their needs and
One to the rebels who love rockin to the beats
One to the healer who fights a disease
One to the Lorax who speaks for the trees
cause no amount of money can bring back to life whats gone when it's done and
One to the people who rise with the sun and
One to the people who sleep when it's gone cause
To the East to the West
To the North and South
This whole thing seems upside down
but the whole wide world keeps turning around
Life is to short to make just one decision and
Music's to large for just one station and
Love is too big for just one nation and
God is too big for just one religion

One to the practice of being in the flow and
One to the tears of the things we let go and
One to the moment we live in right now and
One to the East, West, North and South

And I love for Michael Franti for the song that kept me moving, rotating endlessly through my CD player for months:

Don't fear your best freinds
because a best friend would never try to do you wrong
And don't fear your worst friends
because a worst friend is just a best friend that's done you wrong
And don't fear the night time
because the monsters know that you're divine
And don't fear the sunshine
because everything is better in the summertime.

But it's never too late to start the day over
it's never to late, pick up the phone.
You know it's never too late to lay your head down on my shoulders
it's never too late just come on home

Don't fear the water
because you can swim inside you within your skin
And don't fear your father
because a father's just a boy without a friend
And don't fear to walk slow
don't be a horserace, be a marathon
And don't fear the long road
because on the long road you got a long time to sing a simple song (sing along)

But it's never too late to start the day over
it's never too late, pick up the phone
You know it's never too late to lay your head down on my shoulders
it's never too late just come on home

Don't fear your teachers
because if you listen you can hear your music in a school bell
And don't fear your preacher
if you can't find heaven in a prison cell
And don't fear your own self
paying money to justify your worth
And don't fear your family
because you chose them along time before your birth (yes you did)

Hold to your children
hold to your children
hold to your children
let them know.


And I love Michael for his body, mmm, says the woman who hasn't had sex since July ...
And I have to get up in three hours to write the stuff that pays the bills.
Ah, recreation.
Deliver me. Protect me. Keep me from standing in line for an Oregon Trail card.

Three hours and thirty-four minutes into Friday.
Yell Fire!

4 Comments:

Blogger riversgrace said...

Holly, I absolutely love the writing and where the writing comes from. I feel kindred, especially at the midnight hour. Please keep walking on whatever this path is that inspires the words to flow....and I will walk behind just to see that light.

12:46 PM  
Blogger Carrie Wilson Link said...

Oh, so sweet what Prema said. Holly, I know at 2 AM you feel alone, but you are not. You are fabulous, and you are loved.

7:01 PM  
Blogger Jess said...

I love Trader Joe's and Michael Franti, too. We tried to go see him a few weekends back, but it was sold out and we stood on the sidewalk and tried to listen from there. I'm going to go listen to that song again now.... Thank you...

10:28 AM  
Blogger Jess said...

OK, I love that this first post has all these song lyrics. I need to go listen to this album. Again.

Still love the writing. But are you asking if you are 12 because you have a big crush on Michael Franti? Um, no. Am I 12 for my ridiculous desires? Anyway, I didn't want *that* when I was 12... It took at least a few years to get clear on that one.

And love how my last comment was so "We" without even defining that. Geez...

Love you. :)

10:22 PM  

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