10. Amelia and the Honey Buckets -- I have the only child, the only human, on the planet who LOVES port-o-potties. Driving down Sandy, stopped at a light, two lanes from the curb Amelia said "Mom, stop, there's a port-o-potty." She said it like she was saying "Mom, stop, there's a giant chocolate fountain with marshmallow ducks." She said "stop, there's a port-o-potty right there and I have to go. I'm just going to jump out." 9. Preschool birthday parties and the politics of turning three.
8. Am I dating my family?
7. The Potty training season of toddlerhood or freshly baked training pants drying on my range.
6. Sleep is destroying my writing practice, I need to stop. Sleep deprivation is destroying my sanity, I need to sleep.
5. What's on my list today? Childcare. Meet my new nanny, Freddy. I have come to find while my children spend an hour in Fred Meyer's Playland, I can grab a book and get comfy in home furnishings. I don't think it's an accident, those recliners right next to the books and magazines. I'm enrolling them at Ikea next.
4. I quit my job and now I actually have to work.
3. Feeding street people with my Oregon Trail Card. Oregon Trail Card being a pretty way to say food stamps. I believe my self sufficeincy worker would be A-OK with this.2. I can't think of a number two, lets call it a tribute to the other two-dozen that have come and gone this month.
1. On the stranger side of my life, I had a back rub that wasn't a back rub from my husband who isn't my husband the other night. Just in case my head is not fucked-up enough.
well done!! great list. more than a list really. you have so much going on, i think we can forgive you for not blogging.
ReplyDeletei like how you keep referring to it as a non back rub. i was not familiar with that euphemism before. ;)
i would like to hear more detail about the training pants on the stove, as well as the politics of turning three.
Is that what we're calling "it" now? Non-back rubs? OK, that's cool, just want to be hip like you.
ReplyDeleteNothing gets the job done more efficiently than a good top 10 list! Take an A!
love.
I love your new solution to day care! Great to hear from you again. Hope to see you next weekend.
ReplyDeleteMy kids love Freddy, too. I've also discovered that I can take a book into the sauna at the gym while they're in the kids club there. Unfortunately, the heat gives me hives, but I'm sure it's worth it ;-).
ReplyDeleteThe port-a-potty is a riot! My girls both refuse to use one! Wonder what the attraction is?
personally i think top ten lists are bullshit and pansy assed and i'd like to see a little more from you! not really. i justed wanted to open my official first blog comment with something a little less nicey nice than the standard, you know something to be remembered. i take it back. i like top ten lists and this one was as amusing and insightful as the rest of your stuff. however, i'll expect a first person on the body of the non back rub stat. you gotta give a girl something worth coming back for, my friend! hope you are well, j.
ReplyDeleteLet's hear more on numbers 8, 4 and 1 for damn sure!
ReplyDelete# 5 is brilliant!
ReplyDelete