good morning gratitude
Yesterday at the ACME gym-mart I was working sweat to the surface on the elliptical and trying to focus on one of the 437 TVs suspended from the ceiling. My eyes go nuts in that room with all the machines and mirrors and people in motion competing for my attention, but finally I settled on CNN, plugged in the head phones and steadied myself on election news.
Put all my focus on Obama. Tried to block out the smell one machine over, like halatosis all over his body. I ran harder, CNN shifted stories. The high price of gas and skyrocketing grocery bills. How it's not just fuel, but commodity traders I can thank for dropping $78 on two bags at Trader Joes. And, oh poor me, because I can't pay my bills and I can barely afford food and how can I feel abundant when buying pillow cases for J & A's school plays triggers panic? Blah, blah, blah, blaghty, blah.
Then my old friend gratitude came home.
And, I remembered.
To be thankful.
Because, guess what.
I'm working out for free. My friend Adam GAVE me two remaining years on his three year gym membership because he wasn't using it. Didn't want it to go to waste. Thanks, Adam.
I've been freaking out over how to pay for Amelia's vision therapy, thousands I don't have and insurance says fuck you about. My brother and his partner offered to cover all of it. Thanks Lou and Tom, just typing that brings tears.
I'm driving a car my friend because my friends Karin and Ben GAVE me one. Thanks, Karin and Ben.
When I moved into this apartment, my friend Heidi did up A & J's beds with matching sheets and blankets. Then she took me shopping to set up my kitchen. Thanks, Heidi.
My cousins in Phoenix have been giving me $50 round trip flight vouchers for years so I can get down to the desert and see my family. Thanks, cousins.
My parents pay for the vouchers and contribute $100 a month toward A & J's tuition, and much to much more to list. Thanks, Mom and Dad.
In the past year my family and friends have a contributed a combined thousands in cash money to keep me going, most of it unsolicited and some of it from people I'd never met or barely knew. You know who you are, thank you!
My eyes get overwhelmed with images, sometimes they forget to see there's a whole big wide open sky above me and solid ground here just beneath my feet.
photo: Joy Dutta
posted by holly at 6:04 AM
7 Comments:
What a terrific post! I can see you on the trainer, watching election results, working out the stress.
Such a beautiful list of love and support, Holly. You reap what you sow, my dear. Each and every one of these contributors sees in you (and A & J) something worthy of support. What a tremendous thing that you recognize and appreciate their efforts.
Love.
You made me cry.
Gratitude - works every time. Scarcity is an attitude, not a reality.
Can't talk now, gotta go climb off my high horse.
Great post. I think I'll go make a list like that now of things I'm grateful for now.
You and your amazing kids are near the top of the list.
Love you.
Yes, thank you for reminding me to be and remain grateful for everything. I love how you put it all on the page, that's your gift, my dear. That is a gift that belongs far and wide and we will see you through until that day comes, and then some.
Wow! Way to turn it around. Very impressive!
"Though I am Wednesday's child of woe,
I try not to be ungrateful,
But I was born at midnight black
With a heart that can be hateful."
We all know how easy it is to cultivate gratitude, and how easy it is to forget it. No worries, either way. You are okay.
xo
Oh yes, that was David Francey, from "The Waking Hour."
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